“Can you come pick me up? I had to take the truck to the shop.”
I did not want to hear those words right as I was putting my daughter down for her nap! Apparently, my poor husband had been taking care of car troubles all morning. I thought it was a normal day, with my husband at work, I hadn’t been looking at my phone.
Feeding the Flame of Doubt
Driving to pick him up, I felt my mood on the decrease as I thought about what these truck problems might cost. We’ve got enough, but money is still tight right now. The last thing we needed was to spend our financial cushion. I felt like crying. Later that day I did.
My insecurities set in.
“You are such a loser…if you had taken a real job after college you wouldn’t be in this mess.”
“You aren’t smart enough to have a real job. You don’t have enough talent.”
Naturally, like any good wife, I texted my wallowings to my husband. To which he replied, “It’ll be okay…we have God.”
Hmmm…I know, I know. We have God. Why don’t I feel okay though? Why isn’t that enough for me right now?
God had an answer for me.
Feeding the Flame of the Lord’s Altar
While my daughter was napping, I opened up my Leviticus study and the highlighted verse for the day was Leviticus 6:12:
“The fire on the altar must burn continually; it must not be allowed to go out. The priests are to feed wood to the fire every morning…”
The altar was holy. It was a direct path to the presence of God and communication with him. The aromas burnt on this altar were for God and pleasing to him. I find it so fascinating that God instructed the fire to burn continually. God was the one who started the fire to begin with. Leviticus 9:4 says,
“Fire blazed forth from the Lord’s presence and consumed the burnt offering and the fat on the altar. When the people saw this, they shouted with joy and fell face down on the ground.”
God’s instructions were that the fire on the altar be only the fire from God. The altar offerings were important–they were a means to salvation–and they could only be made with God’s help. This fire on the altar was a symbol of God’s power and presence in the lives of the Israelites and a reminder of their constant need for Him.
This fire didn’t stay burning on its own though. The priests had to feed it each morning with wood so that it would not go out.
Feeding the Flame of Faith
That morning when everything seemed to be going wrong for me I had not fed my fire. That whole week, actually, I had not fed my fire. I don’t mean the literal fire on the altar mentioned in Leviticus, but you know what fire I’m talking about. The Spirit and the passion that lives inside of us when we accept Christ. The Spirit of Christ which cleanses us and makes us holy. Yes, that fire. Perhaps that fire needs to be fed often too. Perhaps that is a flame that should not burn out.
When I feed my flame, I’m reminded of God’s power and of his loving grace. I remember that “I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13) Then, when troubles come my way I don’t have to listen to the devil whisper insecurities in my ear. I won’t be overcome with worry and frustration. Because I have God.
If you’ve accepted Christ as your Savior then you have God, too. Having God means that we see the big picture. We see that we’ve overcome all obstacles already through the blood of Christ. Christ has prepared a way for us to eternal life with God, and that, my sweet friend, is what matters most in this life.
Once I fed my fire that day and was reminded of God’s power and grace, my attitude changed. I began to see all the ways God had provided for us. I was grateful we had the money to pay the car shop and our bills! We had good cars to drive, and all of our needs were met. Things were going to be just fine. (And they were!)
A Flickering Flame or a Roaring Fire?
When we forget to feed our flame, we’ll hold only a small flicker and we’ll forget the power we have in Christ. We must feed our fire daily, every morning, so that it will not run out!
When you wake up each morning, acknowledge our God! Make time to study His word so that you can learn more about Him. Feed your flame! Let God set your heart on fire and may it burn brighter and brighter over time.
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We all have those moments when we realize we have not obedient; a lot of the time, I find myself not having been as grateful for my life and circumstances as I should. I also struggle with going back to work (teaching) or sticking with blogging/writing. God doesn’t promise life will be easy for us; he only ever promised salvation. I love your post. It’s wonderful! It’s so refreshing to know I’m not the only person struggling with these issues.
Yes, Rachael that is so true! The struggle can be realizing that his promise of salvation is enough. It’s enough to keep me and content and joyful. That’s definitely counter culture to the world we live in! Thank you so much for sharing!!
Oh, I love what your husband said — “We’ve got God.” How often I wallow in my own ineptness when “I’ve got God.” It’s much easier for me to remember with a roaring fire in my heart!
Once I realized how that little comment from my husband got me back on track I hit my prayer journal and thanked God for helping him to be spiritual leader I needed in that moment! Such a blessing! Not surprisingly, he’d been regularly reading his bible, listening to sermon podcasts, and plenty of christian music— his fire was roaring!! Thanks for sharing!
It’s important to not only spend time in God’s word, but to fellowship with other Christians as well..
[…] a while or are on fire for our Lord, keep returning to Him. He is the only one who can keep our fire going. And if you feel like your fire is extinguished, rejoice and return to the One who can fan the […]
I can relate- I had lawn mower issues all week, and there is nothing like failing in the keeping up with the yard department to make me doubt my entire existence. It’s crazy how the devil can take one thing and blow it up! Thankfully, some time spent in prayer and the word and the ear of a great friend turned my mood around.
Awesome! Reading this fed my fire! I can relate!
Oh, so glad it blessed you!
We have to feed what we want to grow! Staying in the word is essential.
Phil 4:13 is one of my favorite verses. I have come to realize the importance of beginning my day with a time of renewal alone with God. It allows me to have the strength I need for whatever may come my way. And when I feel ‘doubt’, I know I can come right back into his hands and be refreshed again. Loved this post lady! xo~ D http://www.beyouandthrive.com/thriveblog
I love the focus of this. We often let the cares of this world drown out the flame.
I absolutely loved this. I think too many times this happens to me, where I let my self-doubt and insecurities get in the way of my faith, and I noticed that as soon as I remember that this is all in God’s plan and that he wouldn’t let me go through something I couldn’t handle! Thank you for this post, it was something I really needed to read! Xoxo
These words – we have God! They blew a little wind over my flame today. Thank you!
I love this post! When i start to feel lost, I know I need to draw closer to God. It’s so important to feed my flame and keep the faith going.
Wow! I love that analogy. And it’s so true! When I’m not feeding the fire of the Spirit I lose sight of my need for Him and His presence. I’m definitely going to share this!