Confessions of an Imperfect Homemaker

Tonight I mopped our kitchen floor.

I know, I know. My post is titled “Confessions of an Imperfect Homemaker” and here I am bragging about accomplishing the hardest chore ever. 😉

 

Would it help if I told you that I can’t recall the last time I mopped our floors?

 

I’m definitely an imperfect homemaker.

 

I’ve printed and laminated chore charts, and I’ve read all kinds of blog posts trying to work up the inspiration and motivation to keep better house. It’s just hard!

 

I used to really beat myself up over my lack of pristine cleaning skills, especially after my daughter was born. The words of someone dear to me were a great encouragement.

 

(I’m going to paraphrase here because it was many years ago, and I can’t remember her words exactly.)

 

“Some people are just naturally good at keeping things clean, and others like things clean, but it doesn’t come naturally.”

 

Can you guess which category I fall under? This sweet friend was in the same category so it was extra encouraging to hear it from someone who truly understands.

 

Those words have stayed with me and helped me find grace for myself. Notice I said grace, not excuses. Yes, I still want to work hard to take care of our home. But I’ve come to terms that I might not have the same results as others, and that’s okay.
 

 

The Life-Giving Home

For Christmas I asked my husband for Sally Clarkson’s book The Life-Giving Home. I really had no idea what it was about. I thought it was going to offer me some inspiration for keeping a tidy home and cooking good meals. While Sally does touch on those things a bit, this book was about so much more. In this book co-written with her daughter, they discuss the many ways to cultivate God’s goodness in your home and give life to your family and all who enter your home. Cleaning and cooking have their place, but habits such as listening, deep conversations, and making time for family devotions and celebrations are life-giving as well!

 

As I scurried through this book, completely enthralled, I realized that my value as a wife, mother, and homemaker is not determined by how clean my house is.  God has designed us as women to bring life into our homes in many different ways. Struggling to keep up with chores does not make me a homemaking failure! House cleaning might not be my best quality, but I certainly have other areas where I thrive. There is no perfect homemaker.  As hard as that might be to believe about some of the women in your life, they too have areas in their life that don’t come naturally.

 

This doesn’t mean that we stay where we are. We can definitely strive to form better habits. Sometimes we just have to rise above what’s not natural for us and get the job done.  There is definitely value in having a tidy home, so this post is not to undermine such chores.

However… 

 

If, like me, you find yourself struggling to keep up with the house cleaning, here is my message:

 

We don’t have to feel sorry for ourselves when certain aspects of homemaking don’t come naturally. We should look for the gifts we’ve been given and appreciate the ways we care for our family that come easy to us. Maybe it’s the yummy food we cook, the adventurous spirit we have, the way we are emotionally in tune with the individual needs of our family members, or our love for story time. I’m not sure what your niche is, but Momma, you better believe that you have one! We can go about our lives confidently, knowing that Christ gives us what we need to serve the ones we love with glad and true hearts. While our responsibility to care as a wife, mother, and homemaker is great we can find strength in knowing that we have a heavenly Father who cares for us.

 

 

“The Lord himself watches over you! 
The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade.”
Psalm 121:5

 

Give Yourself Grace

 

So pick yourself up, fellow struggling homemaker! Offer yourself some grace and realize you are exactly what your family needs.You might find that you’re not struggling as badly as you thought. You’ve got this!

 

Comments ( 15 )
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  • Rachel

    I so agree with this! I’m one who strives and strives for that perfectly clean house and can’t possibly have anyone over if it isn’t perfect. It drives everyone in my house batty including me! I’ve been working on giving myself grace. Thank you!

    • Kristin J

      Yes! It’s so sad how many times I’ve passed on opportunities to show hospitality because I’m ashamed that my house isn’t spotless. My pride in this area can definitely put unnecessary pressure on me and my family! Thank you for sharing. 🙂

  • Audrey

    Beautifully written! Our role is so much bigger than cleaners. We are called to be nurturers; to make our homes a haven. I’m looking forward to checking out a Life Giving Home.

    • Kristin J

      Yes it is! So thankful when God quietly reminds me that!

  • Melissa Javan

    Wow, this is an amazing post. I’m such an imperfect homemaker. I love the thoughts you gave on the book. Thank you

    • Kristin J

      So glad you were encouraged. It’s a wonderful book, I definitely recommend it!

  • Amanda

    Oh how I love this! I couldn’t agree more! We need to focus on the gifts that we have, and always allow ourselves and others Grace!

    • Kristin J

      You bring up a really great point about extending grace to others! Thanks! 🙂

  • Sarah@Now One Foot

    Love this! I am naturally not a good cleaner – though I do have an odd zen when I do dishes. I haven’t heard of the book you mentioned but it sounds like a great “food for the soul” type book, I’ll have to check it out!

  • Laura

    I definitely tend to wrap up my value either in how clean my house is or how productive I’ve been that day. I’m a work in progress. And I can’t remember the last time I mopped my floors either. Lol

  • Candice- The Brown Eyed Mom

    I always need to give myself more grace! I don’t know how many opportunities I’ve passed up because my house was “dirty” in the moment. Thanks for this!

  • Lacey Noland

    LOVED THIS!! Completely needed to read it today 🙂

  • Terryn Winfield

    Oh, I love this! I am an imperfect homemaker all the way. It used to really bother me and I would always feel like I was failing. Now, I have learned to give myself grace. My children and my husband come first and as long as my home is kept up and is a warm, welcoming environment for them….I am good with that. I love that book, by the way!