Adoption Truths – International or Domestic
The Best Things in Life
The best things in life are often the things you never planned. I knew when I was a little girl playing with my dolls that I wanted to be a mommy almost more than anything. I never expected that the blessing of international adoption would play a part in my family story.
The truth is that when God wants something, He has a way of getting it. The best things in life often can’t be explained with anything other than God. Out of the blue, God placed the idea of adoption on our hearts and we decided to listen. It has been one of the biggest blessings we will ever have. You can read more specifics of our decision to adopt, the wait, and finally getting our son at Minivan Ministries.
If You Are Considering Adoption
While I can’t really give you all the details of the process because they vary by adoption agency and country, there are a few things that hold true for everyone. If you are considering adoption (or in our case international adoption), there are a few things you should consider…
1. When you decide to adopt, you are “paper pregnant.”
The term comes from all the paperwork you have to do–home studies, applications, screenings. This is just as real and difficult as having a baby in your belly. Since we adopted, we have been blessed with two biological children as well, so I know. You may not bare your all in front of a doctor, but you lay it all out there for social workers to scrutinize. Paper pregnant moms may not have the sickness and birthing pains, but they have the emotions and anxiety. The major downside is that your hard pregnancy will most likely last longer than 9 months.
2. It is expensive–but God will provide.
Many look at adoption as being out of reach. There are yard sales, fundraisers, and grants. There were several times when we didn’t know where the next payment was coming from, but God provided just as we needed it. It is really all in God’s plan. Most people think they can’t afford adoption, but the truth is the price of adoption is comparable to that of a new car. All kinds of people drive around in new cars and don’t think twice. It’s all about where your priorities are.
3. Your child is just as much your child as any biological child.
I love, care for, teach, and pray for my adopted child just as much as I do my biological children. I would die for him. If you are really called to adopt, you will feel that way too. It doesn’t matter that he didn’t come from your belly. The difference is that there is another set of biological parents out there that we need to pray for–for their loss and for their salvation, that my son and his biological parents can be reunited in heaven one day. We have to help our son deal with his emotions about this as well. Usually he just accepts that he is ours. He is an all-American, camouflage-wearing, country accented, Chinese-American boy who fits into our family perfectly. God placed this child in our lives. He just used a different path.
This week we celebrate our Forever Family Day, the day our son was first placed in our arms. It has been 8 of the best years of my life. I wouldn’t change a thing. Our family would never have been complete without our Will. We are thankful every day for the blessing of international adoption…and praying that one day we can do it again! I pray that you may consider if international adoption is right for your family too!